Adam's story

I'm no longer the most important person in the world. I have a partner, and now our son. So for me, it's about: what can I do to be the best role model for him? There's no rulebook... it's about learning and it's about just trying to be a really good example for my son, for my family, for everyone.

Adam is a 29-year-old tradie who grew up in Gordon, near Ballarat. Having the right role models has been incredibly important in forming his ideas about masculinity. Farming, the local footy club, and his own family have all shaped his ideas of what it means to be a man.

Adam and his partner have recently welcomed their first child, a boy. This experience prompted Adam and his partner to think about how they want to raise their son to see beyond traditional gender roles of parenting. Raising a child is a team effort; Mum can go out to work while Dad cooks and cleans. While he knows some guys have fixed views about what's a man's role and what's a woman's role, that's not the case in his family. Growing up with four sisters and his strong mum, he knows that respect and equality are key in healthy relationships. 

Adam works on construction sites, and while it’s work he enjoys, these sites have been places where he’s seen other men make sexist and disrespectful comments that have made him uncomfortable. He’s been able to call his mates in whenever he hears them do this, pulling them aside and asking them to reflect on how it makes others feel, including the women in their lives.

Thinking about his younger years, we asked Adam what advice he’d give himself. He says to be your unique self. You don’t always have to fit in with others’ idea of masculinity. You can speak up and be your own man.