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A violence-free Victoria.

It all starts with respect.

Katen’s story

Young man standing on a football field holding the side of his face for the What Kind of Man Do You Want to Be? campaign.
Young man standing on football field looking towards the sun for the What Kind of Man Do You Want to Be? campaign.
Young man sits on green bench looking towards distance for the What Kind of Man Do You Want to Be? campaign.
Young man sitting on green bench looking towards the distance for the What Kind of Man Do You Want to Be? campaign.
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We had a chat with Katen about the culture at his local footy club and how it influenced his idea of what it means to be a man. He's seen mates try to improve themselves online, who've wound up caught up in a stream of hate.
We had a chat with Katen about the culture at his local footy club and how it influenced his idea of what it means to be a man. He's seen mates try to improve themselves online, who've wound up caught up in a stream of hate.
We had a chat with Katen about the culture at his local footy club and how it influenced his idea of what it means to be a man. He's seen mates try to improve themselves online, who've wound up caught up in a stream of hate.
We had a chat with Katen about the culture at his local footy club and how it influenced his idea of what it means to be a man. He's seen mates try to improve themselves online, who've wound up caught up in a stream of hate.

Video transcript

Video transcript

Video transcript

Video transcript

Strength is speaking up for what is right, rather than going along with it to be cooler or fit in

21-year-old Katen grew up in Footscray and now studies youth work and criminal justice while working with the Western Bulldogs on a Koorie youth leadership program. Like many boys, he first learned what it meant to be a man by watching dads, older teammates and senior players at the footy club: confident, fearless, always in control. But he also saw the darker side: alpha behaviour, egos and “banter” that cut too deep.

At school, Katen called out a classmate who used a sexist slur about his girlfriend. Later he asked himself why. Was it because the comment was wrong, or because it threatened his pride? That moment sparked a bigger reflection on intention, respect and the kind of man he wants to be.

He’s also seen how quickly young men can get drawn into online spaces that turn self-improvement into hate. When mates drift that way, Katen starts with curiosity, not judgment, while knowing change has to come from them.

Today, Katen feels more secure in himself. His partner and his friends are one big circle of equals and jealousy doesn’t have a place. His message to young men is simple: pause, reflect, and take accountability. For him, masculinity isn’t one-size-fits-all. Being a man is about choosing respect, and that choice benefits everyone. 

Being a man can often mean feeling like you have to follow certain rules. When men support each other to decide for themselves "What kind of man do I want to be?", it can benefit you and everyone you care about.

What Kind of Man Do You Want to Be?


We asked Victorian men about everything from fatherhood and relationships to online gaming and social media. Hear their stories.

Hear more from Victorian men

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Portrait of Jack, a participant in What Kind of Man Do You Want to Be?

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